Parenting Struggles: The Honest Reality of Raising Kids

Avantika rose from her regular light sleep to her baby's cries. It was only 5 am, and she put down her baby a few hours ago, although it felt like it had just been a few minutes. As she dragged herself out of bed, she could feel the exhaustion in her bones. Her husband had already left for work, and she was left to manage the chaos alone. It was such a tiring morning, and her day had just begun.

This is the reality of parenting, although many people put up a facade and talk about how much fun they're having. Yes, it's fun but also really difficult, and it's time we acknowledged that!

Parenting can be one of the most rewarding yet challenging tasks for anyone. Hey, what's rewarding does take a lot of effort! Exhibit A - Parenting. You'll be having sleepless nights, managing their poopy diapers and temper tantrums, trying to get them to eat, and so much more. And if you're a working parent, the struggles can be worse. In fact, over half of working parents say working makes it hard to be a good parent.

However, many parents must hide their struggles, mainly because of the pressure to look picture-perfect. And that's precisely what Kofuku is here to address! Let's examine the perception of parenting difficulties, the importance of discussing these challenges openly, and the benefits of seeking advice and support from other parents and professionals!

Parenting comes with its own sets of challenges that can change your mental and physical well-being. Some of them can include:

Sleep Deprivation: With the baby up at the most random hours, you'll have to channel your bygone college party days, so be prepared to lose some sleep. Over 70% of parents are regularly sleep-deprived.

Work-Family Balance: Juggling work and baby responsibilities will make you wish you were an octopus, so try to compromise here and there.

Managing Child Behaviour: Your baby is going to be throwing tantrums, and you're going to have to figure out whether it's because they pooped or they're hungry or maybe they just want to hear "Tauba Tauba" (2024) again for the 50th time.

Financial Strain: Diapers cost A LOT. And so do clothes, strollers, and babysitters. You'll be shelling out a lot of money for your kid!

Maintaining Relationships: You'll spend not just money but a lot of time with your kid, so maintaining friendships and family time will be difficult.

Not many parents talk about how difficult it is to be a parent. With the advent of social media, so many influencers are posting reels about their perfect family and how their kids are the most well-behaved, making it even harder for you to come out with your struggles as a parent.

There seems to be an expectation that parents, especially mothers, should know everything. This perception of being judged or seen as inadequate if they acknowledge their difficulties should go away, and that starts with you!

The pressure to keep up this facade will only lead to parents hiding their struggles, creating a false impression that everyone else has it all together. This, in turn, can result in isolation and inadequacy.

Here are several reasons why it's essential to be open about your struggles as a parent:

Challenges are Normal: When you have open discussions about struggles, you normalize the issues and challenges parents face, which can reduce the stigma surrounding the entire problem.

Emotional Support: Parenting is an emotional rollercoaster; being open about it will make the ride much more accessible than bottling it all up!

Practical Advice: Being open about your issues can help you get legitimate advice from other parents your age instead of relying on your parents or, worse, your in-laws.

Building a Community: Talking about parenting struggles helps build community with other parents! Knowing you're not alone and others are facing similar challenges can help create a sense of solidarity and connection.

Seeking Help and Support

Just like how Vegeta asks for help from everyone to make the most potent spirit bomb, parents have to ask for help around them to manage the perils of parenting effectively. Here's why:

Better Mental Health: Talking about your struggles as a parent can relieve some of your stress. Think of it like venting helps you feel better. It'll help you feel less isolated and more understood.

Improves Your Parenting Skills: Learning from others who seek help and support can help you get ready for the curveballs (and poopy diapers) that your kid throws at you! It'll give you tips and strategies that you can try out.

Stronger Relationships: Opening up to your close friends and family strengthens your bond. It facilitates open communication and mutual understanding!

Make You Resilient: A support group can strengthen you and help you cope with the ups and downs of parenting.

So, how can you seek advice? Many of us wouldn't be comfortable sharing our problems with random people or acquaintances. Here are some options that you can try!

Friends and Family: Reaching out to trusted friends and family members for support and advice can be beneficial and can provide tried-and-tested solutions!

Parenting Groups: Joining local or online parenting groups can allow you to share your experiences and seek advice.

Professional Help: Consulting with pediatricians, therapists, or parenting coaches can provide professional guidance and support.

Books and Resources: Reading parenting books and articles can provide valuable insights and strategies for managing challenges.

Now, we know how important it is to seek support. However, you may feel uncomfortable sharing your struggles out in the open. So, it's crucial to balance maintaining privacy and seeking practical help. Here are some tips for finding that balance:

Trust Who You Confide In: Share your struggles with people you trust and feel comfortable with. This could be a close friend, family member, or a supportive online community.

Set Boundaries: Determine what you're comfortable sharing and set those boundaries straight! What you want to share is all up to you!

Focus on Solutions: When discussing challenges, try to figure out solutions instead of just discussing your problems. This can help you make the conversation much more constructive and helpful.

Respect Others' Privacy: If you're part of a support group, even seeking advice and stories, respect others' privacy and confidentiality. Creating a safe and supportive environment is essential.

If you were in Avantika's position, try to speak up! Talk about your issues, break the perception of parenting difficulties, and we're sure you'll find other parents going through the same thing. By acknowledging and sharing these experiences, we can create a supportive and understanding community where parents feel safe and empowered to seek help and embrace the beautiful chaos of raising children!

Remember, it's okay to admit that parenting is hard, and seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness.