International Men’s Day: Celebrating Achievements and Issues

Being a role model to someone is quite possibly the greatest honor of all. And not to butcher Uncle Ben's quote, but it does come with great responsibility. To properly celebrate International Men's Day, Kofuku is here to guide you on how to be the best role model to the easily influenced group of all: young men.

Don't get us wrong; most young people are because 'tis the age of reason, and with reason comes the need to be guided. They're not yet out of the nest to be fully independent but are gearing up for it. And if they've picked you to guide them, then it's your responsibility to do so. There is no pressure; just the future of this world depends upon you. In many ways, helping guide young men to a more accepting and kind world can literally be the change that we all desperately need. In a patriarchal society that's trying to shed its past mistakes, it is, in fact, everyone's duty to be the best example to a growing young man they can be.

And the best thing is, if you don't know how to be a good role model, you can actually learn to be one. In that process, you may even find some more ways to be the best possible version of you. Having a new set of eyes does put everything in perspective.

Like we said, young men, like everyone else, crave guidance and inspiration. They look up to figures who embody the qualities they aspire to. With millions like Andrew Tate poisoning the youth, you can help them navigate the complexities of adolescence and adulthood, giving them the right tools to develop their own moral compass and a sense of direction.

Through your guidance, you can empower men and boys to fight for the betterment of everyone and themselves. Celebrating International Men's Day means embracing the follies of being a young boy in the current climate.

1. Emotional Intelligence

The main ingredient of positive masculinity is the ability to understand and manage emotions. Accepting that being manly and macho doesn't have anything to do with being violent or stoic is a great first step. When you openly start expressing feelings, practising empathy, and seeking help when needed, you start dismantling what being a man means. And that is an invaluable lesson to teach young men who look to you as a role model.

Having someone who helps them express themselves healthily without judgement or admonishment can put up a strong foundation for them to become healthy adults. It can break the gender stereotypes that they're systematically taught and help them with their own gender expression.

Through emotional intelligence, they can learn about good communication. This will further help them seek knowledge and apply themselves without endangering them to age-inappropriate content.

2. Respect for Others

Respect is the very foundation of healthy relationships. As a role model, your job is to evaluate your part in every relationship you've ever been in or still are in. See if your actions and what you preach match up because children can handle almost any mistake on an adult's part except for hypocrisy. Be open about both your low moments and your successes.

If you're not a parent or a new parent, you might be surprised that children must be taught to be kind, but that is the truth. Growing up, they observe and emulate every action that people around them are showing, so treating all individuals with respect, regardless of their background, is non-negotiable. This, of course, includes treating everyone with dignity and kindness. It further instils the importance of gender equality.

3. Healthy Relationships

Trying your best to have healthy relationships can also be great because it can model effective communication, compromise, and conflict resolution. By making sure you yourself are having strong, supportive relationships, you inspire young men around you to do the same.

4. Strong Work Ethic

In an academic setting, like, say, a school, being a role model means a little different. Here, you can encourage and empower men and boys to pursue their passions with perseverance and commitment. It's a space prime for teaching that hard work and the occasional luck can do wonders. You can demonstrate the importance of time management, goal setting, and overcoming challenges. Because here, you become more than a role model: a mentor.

Being in such a position where you can influence hundreds of lives needs to be your first thought. Most celebrities fail at this stage because, in India, many are, by default, considered role models. Especially film stars who were the role models of 34.8% of Indian adolescents, making them the top choice. However, many researchers have found that having real-life role models is healthier than having fictitious ones. Unlike movie characters, real-life people are complex and are not watered down to heroes and villains.

5. Lifelong Learning

Much like you are learning to better yourself, having this thirst for knowledge can be passed down to young men who look up to you. Having conversations that revolve around their latest interests can be very motivating.

Seeing you read books, watch speeches, and critically analyse campaigns will inspire their need to further their arsenal as well. A shared hobby is the golden ticket! Hold it tight and help the young ones stay curious and open-minded until they're your age and can become role models.

6. Physical and Mental Health

Supporting mental health and raising awareness about it is how you can help protect the minds of the youth of tomorrow. Especially because young boys look to other men for role models and can easily fall into harmful ideations. One of the main examples is boys without proper role models, and mentors who can discuss safe sex often discover pornography early and fall into distorted ideas about women and relationships.

Their brain is developed enough to realise that being ripped will get you girls, and that is another trap altogether. Because contrary to popular belief, eating disorders are as common with men as they are with women. Especially a particular little thing called muscle dysmorphia, a subtype of body dysmorphic disorder. And predictably, it affects a lot of bodybuilders and aspiring bodybuilders.

Helping them understand that being fit and exercising is part of their self-care and not another way to develop an identity crisis. Just because they have zero muscles, it doesn't make them any less men. Having a good support system that affirms this can do wonders for a growing boy.

7. Community Involvement

Men are taught to be involved in society superficially. With patriarchy making sure they don't really have to fight for their utmost fundamental right like most other minorities, men grow up complacent to many community-wide issues.

As a role model, your duty is to make them care. As simple as that sounds, it's anything but. Most often, all it takes is for you to care and be involved so that they will follow in your steps. But sometimes, educating these young men on why they should care gives that much-needed oomph.

Whether it be volunteering in libraries or signing a petition for pro-choice legislation, it's important that you reinstate why the community needs to thrive. This is how they'll help create a more just and equitable society.

8. Self-Awareness and Self-Love

Of course, for all this to happen, they first need to be able to think for themselves. The kids getting influenced left, right, and centre are less educated about world affairs and thus less likely to form opinions that aren't spoon-fed to them.

Consistently challenging their existing views and opinions on things through updated knowledge is one of the best ways to make them self-aware. And it's one of those things that you can't unsee. Once that bridge is open, every idea and opinion they have must go through it. This is when they lose and find themselves.

This is when they truly start growing up enough to identify their strengths and weaknesses and develop a positive self-image. By loving themselves, they can build the confidence to pursue their dreams, which is essential for continuing to hold hope for the future.

9. Ethical Decision-Making

With self-reflection, many dilemmas pop up. You can help by showing integrity, honesty, and fairness in all your dealings. Most of all, and this is of utmost importance; you can teach young men to consider the consequences of their actions and make decisions that align with their values.

10. Advocacy for Equality

By showing how to respect women while most of the world and media are not-so-subtly hinting at the opposite will be a bit difficult, but you must persist. By redefining masculinity to fit your gender expression, you've already broken most stereotypes.

And as we at Kofuku always say, breaking one more stereotype doesn't hurt anyone. Take a bold stance on how you perceive equality, be proud in your proclamation as a feminist, clarify why feminism also helps men, preach and practice inclusivity, challenge harmful stereotypes and promote respectful, equitable relationships with women.

If the above-mentioned traits can make you become the best role model for a growing young man, here's why the opposite is true of actual influencers.

We all know social media platforms can be a double-edged sword. With zero lessons on internet safety and how to know propaganda when they see one, young boys fall into content that perpetuates harmful stereotypes and promotes toxic masculinity.

As a role model, you can help them browse these platforms by critically evaluating content and challenging harmful narratives. Keep a tight balance between monitoring what they consume and giving them the tools to rightly decide for themselves.

A study that polled 1000 children reported that nearly half of them turned to YouTubers for advice on careers or fitting in. And these YouTubers might talk about Andrew Tate or Sneako in a positive light, and therein is the entrance to a whole another level of hell.

These guys are literal criminals and sex offenders, but they still get so much attention from the adult crowd that has already gone too deep into the enemy waters. There's been a worldwide cry for help from teachers, mothers and therapists to remove Tate from the easily influenced young minds.

Stop constantly shoving content about him or his ideologies on social media platforms. Because their sons and students are repeating the misogynistic words of these grown men.

Many of them are lured in by being powerful or being a "man" the right way and not the left way. Instead of saying don't do it, remove the allure of it. Show them what ugliness lay beneath these flowery, sorry, manly, musky words.

Show them how they treat women and men who don't meet their standards. These guys believe pronouns are a queer thing. Show them how stupid these ideologies are and how fatalistic the future is when these guys are given the power to shape it.

By showing exactly how they influence vulnerable men, you empower boys who can avoid becoming those men. With algorithms and anime on your side, you can turn the tide around with just a few choice words.

Being responsible for another whole being is a stressful thing. Especially young boys who are constantly told that they can get away with anything without consequences. Looking at the declining birth rate in South Korea and the start of something similar in India after back-to-back news of violence against women, it's clear that women are pretty much done educating everyone else.

So, for a change, make this International Men's Day about the women who are tired of the cards stacked against them. Uplift their voices and help them make a more equitable world by educating young men.

And most of all, as cheesy as it sounds, be the change you want to see in the world. Break the cycle of toxic boyhood that leads to toxic masculinity and redefine what it means to be a man. Become the man you wished you had as a role model growing up!