Myths of Perfect Parenting – Don’t Fall for These Lies

One evening, Aditi was sitting on the edge of her daughter's bed, tears welling in her eyes. Her six-year-old, Abishek, had thrown another tantrum because he was denied a second gulab jamun. Aditi felt lost and overwhelmed, doubting her abilities as a parent. "Am I even a good mother? Should I have just given him a second one? He's just a kid," she thought with a pensive yet helpless look on her face.

She remembered the countless parenting books she had read, the advice from friends and family, and the perfect images of parenthood she saw on social media. Despite all this, she still felt like she was failing. "Good parents always know what to do," she thought to herself. But is that really true?

Perfect parenting just doesn't exist. Let's get that straight. Whether your first baby is just a few weeks old or you're 12 kids deep, there is no perfect way to parent your kid. So, let's just take a look at some common parenting perfection myths and see how you can be a great parent for your kid!

Unrealistic Expectations

The notion that good parents always know what to do sets an unrealistic expectation. Parenting is not a God-given talent or a skill that comes with a manual; rather, it is a journey where you learn and adapt. Parenting challenges are a reality, and when you expect perfection, you can criticise yourself and get anxious when things do not go as planned.

Social Media Influence

Instagram often portrays a 'perfect' way of parenting. In fact, social media, in general, can ruin your mental health. But who can blame these influencers? No one wants to see snotty noses and poopy diapers of random babies on their feed. This can create the false impression that other parents have it all figured out while you struggle. But trust us, no one has it figured out, and we're all learning on the job.

The Impact of Comparison

Never compare yourself to other parents. Every family is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Embrace your individuality and focus on your own parenting journey!

Every Child Is Unique

Remember that every child is unique; what worked for your child might not work for another child, even within the same family. Understanding and adapting to your child's unique needs and personality is the most significant part of your parenting journey.

Unpredictable Situations

Parenting is full of unpredictable situations. Parents often find themselves in uncharted territory, from falling sick out of nowhere to sneaking girls home. It is impossible to be prepared for every scenario, and learning to navigate these challenges as they come up is a big part of what makes you a good parent.

Balancing Roles

Parenting involves a mix of roles: caring for children, feeding them, teaching them values, and disciplining them. It's not always a happy and fun journey, and balancing these can often be hard and frustrating. Remember that it's normal to feel overwhelmed and seek support when you need help or advice.

Emotional Rollercoaster

Parents experience everything from joy and pride to frustration and guilt. Acknowledging these feelings and practising self-compassion can help parents navigate the emotional rollercoaster of parenting.

Learn From Your Mistakes

Every parent makes mistakes. Instead of seeing mistakes as failures, look at them as learning opportunities! Reflect on what went wrong and how you can improve. This can lead to personal growth and make you a better parent!

Seek Guidance

There's nothing wrong with asking for help. There are many sources, such as YouTube videos, parenting books, and Kofuku blogs! You can also join parenting groups or attend workshops that offer support and practical tips.

Open Communication

Try to be open and honest with your kid as much as possible. Listen to their needs and concerns and involve them in problem-solving. This can strengthen your relationship and help you better understand their perspectives.

Be Flexible and Adaptable

Being flexible and adaptable is critical to successful parenting. Life is unpredictable, and being open to change and willing to adjust your approach can help you navigate challenges more effectively.

Celebrate Small Victories

The world of parenting is filled with small victories that are worth celebrating! Whether your child has won an art competition or stood up for their friend when they were being bullied, celebrate it with them! Acknowledge their success, and seeing them happy will reinforce your parenting decisions!

Continuous Growth

Remember that parenting is a continuous process, and as your child grows, so should your parenting methods. Your goo goo ga ga isn't going to work when your child is 10. Embracing the idea that there is always room for improvement can help you stay motivated and open to learning.

Self-Compassion

Remember that you are doing your best, and mistakes are okay! Being kind to yourself can reduce stress and improve your overall well-being, making you a better parent.

Build Resilience

Resilience allows you to bounce back from setbacks and confidently move forward. Teaching your children about resilience by modelling it in your behaviour can also help them gain confidence and develop this critical skill.

Finding Balance

Take time out for yourself and let your friends or parents babysit for a while—we're sure they'll love to help out! This can also help you get some rest, recharge your energy, and even do some introspective thinking about your parenting methods.

Here's a reminder. You're doing great as a parent! Your kid loves you, and even though they probably don't say it enough, they would not have anyone else as a parent! You're doing an excellent job if you don't feel like you're doing so! Why else would you be on this blog?

Remember, parenting perfection is not real, but it's a journey that involves continuous learning and adaptation. Recognising and celebrating the learning process can build resilience, find balance, and create a positive and nurturing environment for your children. Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect parent, but there is great value in being a good parent who is there for their kids and is committed to growth and learning.